Do people evolve in the way they cry? For instance, I have not actually balled my eyes out for quite a while. When I cry now, I'm usually just sitting there and a flash of something once there will make tears stream down my face. It is very strange, very unexplainable! Blaise once told me that he cried like that when he was my age. He was just lying on the couch and tears were streaming down his face and he didn't know why. It is always a culmination of everything topped off by something you consider to be big. My big thing was always girls, and it probably always will be. It might actually end up being toilet paper in the future because it makes me very upset when there is none. No, I don't think that would upset me.

I don't cry often, really. It is terrible and dispiriting and leaves me with a feeling of genuine emptiness. I have chosen the other route, which is buying a bicycle and riding it until you smile genuinely. My life is not tragic, but whenever I reminisce about the past, I elevate fond memories to a spurious perfection that never seems to have actually existed. It is the life of a writer, and I suppose it's just what I have to deal with.

The weather has been nice, but I need a few more sweaters for chilly nights.

-george